Dear Mr. Donald Sexton,
I am so sorry to bother you postmortem, but I feel that there is something you should know:
Not only did you fail to kill your wife Tammy, but you made her famous. Really famous.
You must be thinking, "Oh, no! Did I miss?"
No, your shot was good. And this my friend will make her famous.
"No, it's not possible!" you bluster.
Alas, but it is. In fact, a similar case occurred in 1848 with a railroad foreman named Phinneas Gage. May I tell you the story?
Gage was working for Rutland and Burlington Railroad in Vermont. His crew was responsible for preparing the roadbed by blasting rock that was in the way. On September 13th, Gage was packing a hole with gunpowder, The powder had been packed without the requisite sand and when Gage brought down his large tamping iron into the hole, gunpowder exploded and the tamping iron was blasted straight through Gage's left cheek and out the top of his skull.
Gage not only survived this wound, but within a few minutes of the injury he regained consciousness and made the 3/4-mile ride back into town.
Recent analyses of his skull show that the spike severely damaged his anterior frontal cortex (there is debate as to both sides, or only the left was destroyed). which in turn caused drastic personality changes. Where Gage was once gentile, patient and hard working, he became impulsive and obstinate, and developed a violent temper. For the rest of his life, he insisted on carrying the fateful spike with him wherever ever he went.
The case of Phinneas Gage was famous with in the man's own lifetime and over 150 years later. .. which leads me to believe that your wife will experience the same type of fame. (Maybe more given in the improved technology there is to study her brain and the effects of the damage.)
Cheers!
Laura
RSS Feed